Goals

What do we want on this life’s journey?

The way you answer that question will color your whole life.

If one answers with a series of predetermined end points or goals, life can become a series of frustrations/disappointments if these end points are not met. This can be especially true if you obtain one of the goals, and the feeling of accomplishment does not match the expectation.

The other issue may be the source of the goals. Did you choose them? Or were they foisted upon you by family/culture/society?

There’s a balance to be struck between positive goal setting and restrictive life framing.

If we define life according to a series of restrictive or highly defined end points, we limit the ways in which the universe or God can flow through our lives. We cry out when circumstance fails to match the vision or expectation of our set point.

On the other hand, we can set goals for ourselves that allow for a positive forward and higher ideal for ourselves. These goals then create a framework to guide positive action. Here, the goal feeds positive movement that leads to growth. In time, the growth may lead to resetting the goal, and the growth obtained in striving for the original goal, i.e., the journey, is the reward. Actually reaching or achieving the original goal ends up not defining us. We may be disappointed in not reaching a goal, but we are grateful for the growth because the growth affords us a new perspective, a new vantage point from which a new goal, a new striving, can lead to new growth.

With this approach, life becomes a series of journeys – each with its own growth potential – each with its own joys to provide.

How do we know we are on the “right” journey, striving toward the “right” goal?

First, there is no “right” journey. Every experience is sacred in the sense that it came with engagement with life and therefore can provide learning. That said, the fulfilling journey is one with joy/excitement. Does your goal bring you excitement? Do the steps or actions toward your goal bring joy or excitement? Follow that.

Understand that the inevitable challenges met along the way serve to teach, not punish. And, it’s OK to reset a goal from a new perspective.

Don’t let culture plan your life. Reflect on yourself, find what excites you, build goals around that, and step. Enjoy the journey.